Therapy for Black Women Who Feel the “Switch Flip”

If you shut down, snap fast, or take over when things feel out of control, therapy helps you understand the reaction and change the pattern.

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As Seen In…….

“Abandonment issues can largely be created from childhood trauma and the schemas we develop as a result.” — Chrystal Dunkers, LPC

Published in Women.com - “Reconciling Abandonment Issues & Relationships”

If You’ve Ever Felt That Switch

When Your Emotions Move Faster Than You Can Explain

You know that moment when something shifts inside you.

The irritation, the heat, the overwhelm….and suddenly you’re quiet, distant, or reacting faster than you meant to?

People see attitude or anger, but that’s not what’s happening.

Your body is overloaded, your mind is racing, and you’re trying to stay in control of a moment that feels like it’s slipping.

do something for yourself
What It Looks Like on the Outside

And What’s Really Going On Inside

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Here’s what strong reactions actually look like in Black women:

  • You shut down fast when the pressure hits.

  • You snap before you can stop it, then feel guilty later.

  • You go quiet even though your mind is doing the most.

  • You feel the heat or tension rise in your body before the words come out.

  • You take over because nobody else seems to handle things.

  • You replay the moment again and again, wondering if you were “too much.”

  • You get irritated quickly, then confused about why it felt so big.

  • You feel misunderstood even by people who love you.

  • You withdraw because you don’t want to make things worse.

These reactions aren’t random.

They’re survival strategies your system learned a long time ago.

There’s a Reason You React So Fast

Your reactions don’t come out of nowhere.

  • They’re connected to the roles you’ve played for years.

  • The strong one.

  • The fixer.

  • The peacekeeper

  • The person who holds everything together.

    When something feels unsafe, uncertain, or out of control, your system moves fast:

  • Snap to defend yourself

  • Shut down to stay safe

  • Take over to keep things from falling apart.

    It’s not anger. It’s not attitude.
    It’s your body trying to protect you the only way it knows how.

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What We Work On Together

  • Catching the reaction before it spirals

  • Understanding what triggers the switch

  • Slowing your body down so you don’t shut down or snap

  • Communicating what you feel without going quiet or going off

  • Letting go of the need to take over everything

What Begins to Feel Different
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Your Body Doesn’t Hit the Panic Button

You don’t shut down as fast.

You don’t snap as quickly.

You notice the pressure building before it takes over and you have tools to steady yourself in the moment.

Conversations get easier, your relationships feel safer, and you move through stress without the blowups, guilt, or emotional hangovers.

If You’re Tired of the Same Cycle

This Doesn’t Have to Keep Happening

If you’re tired of shutting down, snapping fast, or feeling like your reactions run the moment, let’s talk.

Therapy helps you understand what’s underneath, slow the switch, and respond in ways that feel more like you.


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Therapy for Strong Reactions Across New Jersey

Whether you’re in Bergen, Middlesex, Essex, or Somerset County or anywhere across New Jersey, I offer online therapy for Black women who shut down, snap fast, or take over when overwhelm hits.


Virtual sessions make it easier to get grounded, culturally attuned support without the stress of commuting or rearranging your entire day.